People always tell me that I’m blessed to be in this kind of relationship. Some even say (and I’m talking about my bitter Single friends) that I’m blessed just to be in a relationship.
I couldn’t agree more. I really am blessed to love and be loved in return.
It wasn’t always this easy, you know.
I have been consistent with my pool of men: The handsome men who drives women crazy. The innocent-looking men who showed nothing but kindness but are pretenders in real life. The men who would do anything to get you to bed. The liars. The jerks.
My longest relationship was with my Super Ex-Boyfriend which lasted for two years. I was very much inlove. Needless to say, he was, in his own way, loving me with all he had. But the relationship just wasn’t right. Eventually we had to break up, and I had to deal with the loss of someone I had intended to share my future with.
It wasn’t an easy decision. After that relationship, I prayed and knelt to God, crying. I was telling Him that I surrender my all to Him. I sought His will. I asked Him to fill all the empty spaces in my heart, that I may no longer feel incomplete again. I asked Him to be my partner, my lover, my bestfriend, my Dad.
After that prayer (which led my eyes to be smaller than they usually were), I lived my life according to His will. I made sure that no guy would ever come between me and my God. I focused on God and God alone.
It wasn’t easy.
I chose to be single for 6 years. The longest 6 years of my life. You see, I started dating when I was 13 years old, so being single was a struggle for me.
Over and over again a guy would come and steal my heart away, offering me company during the times when I felt most lonely. Of course, because I was guarding my heart, I pushed guys away. But because I’m a girl, most of the time, I gave in. And the ending would be very, very tragic.
I ended up getting more hurt. This is the classic ‘I should have known better’ situation.
So I reminded myself that I would never settle for less. That God is all I need. That in God’s perfect time, somebody will come.
The waiting stage was the most painful of all. Loneliness would strike me. The past would haunt me.
But I stood on my ground.
I made sure that God was first in my life. That no man would interfere with my relationship with God. That I am my own self. That I need not be in a relationship with a man to feel complete, because the love of God completes me.
Loneliness would once in a while come to me, but because I have God, I felt contented and secured.
And then, just when I thought that I was called to be single for the rest of my life (believe me, I thought that I was called for single-blessedness), somebody came.
Somebody who is a living persona of my dream guy.
This may sound so cheesy but I had to say it: I NEVER IMAGINED THAT SUCH A HUMAN BEING EXISTS.
And so I sought God’s approval. I knew that if I want this relationship to last, it had to have God’s blessing.
After weeks of praying, the Lord answered.
And so He is my answered prayer.
I never thought that I would be in this kind of relationship. Everything is perfect. LIKE SERIOUSLY. The Lord just kept on blessing us in so many ways, it’s just so overwhelming.
It is so true that when you obey God, His favor will come to you. OBEDIENCE PRECEDES FAVOR. Put it there.
I chose to obey God despite what people thought of me. My friends thought it was crazy for me not to entertain men because I was waiting for “the perfect guy”. Guy friends would discourage me that such men only exist in movies.
I chose to obey despite the hurt that I’m feeling from letting go the handsome guy who courted me.
I chose to obey despite living in a society where being with a guy makes a girl complete.
I chose to obey.
Because I obeyed, the Lord rewarded me. I was waiting and hurting and crying, but I did not give in.
The Lord rewards those who are obedient to his will.
And so, let me share this song which has been my waiting song. To all the single, seeking girls out there, God’s got you. Wait on His will. Trust and obey. The Lord blesses those who obey.
LOVE IS WAITING
In the autumn on the ground,
between the traffic and the ordinary sounds
I am thinking signs and seasons while a north wind blows through
I watch as lovers pass me by
Walking stories – whos and hows and whys
Musing lazily on love
I’ll give it time, give it space and be still for a spell
When it’s time to walk that way we wanna walk it well
I’ll be waiting for you baby
I’ll be holding back the darkest night
Love is waiting til we’re ready, til it’s right
Love is waiting
It’s my caution not the cold
there’s no other hand that i would rather hold
the climate changes, I’m singing for the strangers about you
don’t keep time, slow the pace
Honey hold on if you can
the bets are getting surer now that you’re my man
I could write a million songs about the way you say my name
I could live a lifetime with you and then do it all again
and like I can’t force the sun to rise or hasten summer’s start,
neither should I rush my way into your heart